HEALING FROM HEARTACHE
As women we are fully conscious of the needs of those we love; often giving ourselves freely and openly, sometimes until we have nothing left for ourselves. During times of heartache, we may forget that WE need personal care.
In 2009, I was facing the most difficult time of my life. My heart hurt so deeply, not just emotionally, but physically ached so acutely, that I thought I’d never heal. The love of my life, my husband of 27 years, had walked out. This man I loved was having a midlife crisis and told me he didn’t know who he was anymore. He decided he had to leave to find out.
This left me reeling. How on earth was I supposed to go on without him?
How would my life ever be ok again? For a while, it wasn’t ok. But in time, in the midst of my deepest heartache, I was finally able to pick myself up and start again.
You may be finding yourself in your darkest days….your deepest heartache. If so my friend, I want to share some tips to assist you on your healing journey.
1. Time is your friend. In time the pain will lesson, become bearable, and eventually your heart will heal.
2. Reach out to friends who buoy you up and speak positive words. Share what is going on, how you feel. Ask that they allow you to talk, laugh, scream or cry, and just be there to listen.
3. WRITE... a lot! Writing or blogging is very therapeutic. Giving yourself permission to write will get the emotions out of your body and enrich the “physical” healing process.
4. Seek spiritual guidance. Go to your spiritual source. If you do not have a spiritual belief, now may be the time to study this part of your life; find what you believe.
Your creator knows you better than anyone else in this world. Your creator knows what you were designed to do. What your purpose is on this earth. And what you should do next. Rely on this source for guidance over all others!
Allow for quiet moments, times of stillness, meditation and prayer. Quiet times are the moments we can get answers and guidance to assist us in moving forward. The most powerfully profound experiences have come to me during times of communicating with God. He has guided my life in such a way that has amazed and intrigued me and is continually healing my soul. He has been my greatest strength.
5.Remember when you were young. What toys did you love to play with? What activities and games made you laugh? Search back in your mind and find a time when you remember being super happy as a child. What were you doing? Visit that place again. Remember how it felt to laugh, to play, to be free. Give yourself permission to play. Playing will help you “find” yourself again.
6.Take care of yourself first. This means every part of you, from your head to your toes! Get up every morning, no matter how difficult that may seem. Shower, eat a healthy breakfast, and then do something just for you. Something YOU love.
Pamper Yourself! Take hot bubble baths, get your hair colored, go on long walks, drink herbal tea, snuggle under a cozy blanket while watching a movie, or read an inspiring book.
Two favorites: “Remembering Wholeness” By Carol Tuttle, and “Captivating” By John and Stasi Eldridge.
7. Remember...no one gets to tell you how long your grieving process should be! Every heartache is different. Every person heals differently. Allow yourself to grieve as long as you need to...but not so long that you loose site of the beauty life still has to offer you!
Most of all, my friend, Learn to
LOVE YOURSELF!
Show yourself love by giving yourself the gift of TIME. Time for you, time for inspiration and guidance, time for self-care.
One day you will find that it does not hurt so much anymore.
All my Love,
Renee
a.k.a. Mama Dezee
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